Personality Isn't Permanent: Break Free from Self-Limiting Beliefs and Rewrite Your Story
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- Create Date：2021-06-05 09:54:46
- Update Date：2025-09-07
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- Author：Benjamin P. Hardy
- ISBN：0593083318
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Summary
Psychologist and bestselling author Benjamin Hardy， PhD， debunks the pervasive myths about personality that prevent us from learning--and provides bold strategies for personal transformation
In Personality Isn't Permanent， Dr。 Benjamin Hardy draws on psychological research to demolish the popular misconception that personality--a person's consistent attitudes and behaviors--is innate and unchanging。 Hardy liberates us from the limiting belief that our "true selves" are to be discovered， and shows how we can intentionally create our desired selves and achieve amazing goals instead。 He offers practical， science-based advice to for personal-reinvention， including:
- Why personality tests such as Myers-Briggs and Enneagram are not only psychologically destructive but are no more scientific than horoscopes
- Why you should never be the "former" anything--because defining yourself by your past successes is just as damaging to growth as being haunted by past failures
- How to design your current identity based on your desired future self and make decisions here-and-now through your new identity
- How to reframe traumatic and painful experiences into a fresh narrative supporting your future success
- How to become confident enough to define your own life's purpose
- How to create a network of "empathetic witnesses" who actively encourage you through the highs and lows of extreme growth
- How to enhance your subconscious to overcome addictions and limiting patterns
- How redesign your environment to pull you toward your future， rather than keep you stuck in the past
- How to tap into what psychologists call "pull motivation" by narrowing your focus on a single， definable， and compelling outcome
The book includes true stories of intentional self-transformation--such as Vanessa O'Brien， who quit her corporate job and set the Guinness World Record for a woman climbing the highest peak on every continent in the fastest time; Andre Norman， who became a Harvard fellow after serving a fourteen-year prison sentence; Ken Arlen， who instantly quit smoking by changing his identity narrative; and Hardy himself， who transcended his childhood in a broken home， surrounded by issues of addiction and mental illness， to earn his PhD and build a happy family。
Filled with strategies for reframing your past and designing your future， Personality Isn't Permanent is a guide to breaking free from the past and becoming the person you want to be。
In Personality Isn't Permanent， Dr。 Benjamin Hardy draws on psychological research to demolish the popular misconception that personality--a person's consistent attitudes and behaviors--is innate and unchanging。 Hardy liberates us from the limiting belief that our "true selves" are to be discovered， and shows how we can intentionally create our desired selves and achieve amazing goals instead。 He offers practical， science-based advice to for personal-reinvention， including:
- Why personality tests such as Myers-Briggs and Enneagram are not only psychologically destructive but are no more scientific than horoscopes
- Why you should never be the "former" anything--because defining yourself by your past successes is just as damaging to growth as being haunted by past failures
- How to design your current identity based on your desired future self and make decisions here-and-now through your new identity
- How to reframe traumatic and painful experiences into a fresh narrative supporting your future success
- How to become confident enough to define your own life's purpose
- How to create a network of "empathetic witnesses" who actively encourage you through the highs and lows of extreme growth
- How to enhance your subconscious to overcome addictions and limiting patterns
- How redesign your environment to pull you toward your future， rather than keep you stuck in the past
- How to tap into what psychologists call "pull motivation" by narrowing your focus on a single， definable， and compelling outcome
The book includes true stories of intentional self-transformation--such as Vanessa O'Brien， who quit her corporate job and set the Guinness World Record for a woman climbing the highest peak on every continent in the fastest time; Andre Norman， who became a Harvard fellow after serving a fourteen-year prison sentence; Ken Arlen， who instantly quit smoking by changing his identity narrative; and Hardy himself， who transcended his childhood in a broken home， surrounded by issues of addiction and mental illness， to earn his PhD and build a happy family。
Filled with strategies for reframing your past and designing your future， Personality Isn't Permanent is a guide to breaking free from the past and becoming the person you want to be。
Reviews
Tasos
，
Life changer。 Just what I needed the right m8mrnt。 Thanks。 As smatter of facked u needed that kind of info。 I m grateful the the writer。 Hope to meat you。
Muhammad Shoaib
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What a book！！！！ Best book I've read in 2021。。。。。 Cleared many many of my concepts（False ones actually）。。。。Love it。。。。。 What a book！！！！ Best book I've read in 2021。。。。。 Cleared many many of my concepts（False ones actually）。。。。Love it。。。。。 。。。more
Jack Alexander
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Lots of interesting points I hadn't thought about before。 Lots of interesting points I hadn't thought about before。 。。。more
APWBDOBBY
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Should be a required read for everyone。 Such an important topic。
Tùng Lâm Phạm
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Đừng tin các bài trắc nghiệm tính cách – Cuốn sách thú vị ngay từ tiêu đềTôi ấn tượng với “Đừng tin các bài trắc nghiệm tính cách” ngay từ tiêu đề bởi bản thân vốn là người rất thích các bài trắc nghiệm tính cách。 Thật đấy， từ bé tôi đã thích làm trắc nghiệm vui trên báo Hoa Học Trò （mượn của chị gái）。 Sau này khi được anh Trần Đăng Khoa giới thiệu MBTI， tôi cũng cố xin tiền mẹ tham gia một lớp của TGM。 Rồi mỗi khi nghe đến bài trắc nghiệm nào hay， tôi đều phải thử cho bằng được: DISC， Enneagram Đừng tin các bài trắc nghiệm tính cách – Cuốn sách thú vị ngay từ tiêu đềTôi ấn tượng với “Đừng tin các bài trắc nghiệm tính cách” ngay từ tiêu đề bởi bản thân vốn là người rất thích các bài trắc nghiệm tính cách。 Thật đấy， từ bé tôi đã thích làm trắc nghiệm vui trên báo Hoa Học Trò （mượn của chị gái）。 Sau này khi được anh Trần Đăng Khoa giới thiệu MBTI， tôi cũng cố xin tiền mẹ tham gia một lớp của TGM。 Rồi mỗi khi nghe đến bài trắc nghiệm nào hay， tôi đều phải thử cho bằng được: DISC， Enneagram， Insights， Winslow， NEO， HEXACO， Sale Dogs… thú thực tôi cũng không nhớ mình từng làm bao nhiêu bài nữa。 Vì vậy， tôi thực sự tò mò khi gặp cuốn sách với tiêu đề đầy tính phản biện như thế này！“Đừng tin các bài trắc nghiệm tính cách” đã chỉ ra năm lầm tưởng về tính cách mà chúng ta hay gặp phải:- Lầm tưởng 1: Tính cách có thể chia thành “các kiểu”- Lầm tưởng 2: Tính cách là bẩm sinh và không đổi- Lầm tưởng 3: Tính cách là do quá khứ của bạn quy định- Lầm tưởng 4: Tính cách phải được khám phá ra- Lầm tưởng 5: Tính cách là con người thật sự và “xác thực” của bạnLà một tiến sĩ tâm lý học， tác giả Benjamin Hardy không lập luận hay phán xét một cách vô căn cứ mà luôn dẫn chứng các công trình nghiên cứu tiên tiến về não bộ và tâm lý học。 Ông cũng thẳng thắn chỉ ra những chỗ thiếu cơ sở của các bài trắc nghiệm。 Chẳng hạn hai tác giả của MBTI Test là Katharine Briggs và Isabel Myers đều chưa từng trải qua đào tạo về tâm lý học hay tâm thần học， họ cũng chưa từng làm việc trong phòng thí nghiệm hay viện học thuật nào mà thực tế thì Katharine Briggs phát triển MBTI từ kinh nghiệm làm vợ và làm mẹ！ Còn rất nhiều “sự thật” thú vị khác được tác giả đưa ra， tôi tin rằng bạn sẽ bất ngờ， thậm chí không muốn chấp nhận nó mặc dù tất cả đều đã được kiểm nghiệm thực tiễn bằng khoa học。Và sau tất cả những điều này， phải chăng Benjamin Hardy chỉ muốn kêu gọi mọi người “tẩy chay” các bài trắc nghiệm tính cách？ Có lẽ cái mà tác giả muốn nói thiên về cách mình nhìn nhận bài trắc nghiệm tính cách ra sao。 Chẳng hạn ở góc độ cá nhân， tôi vẫn phải thừa nhận rằng các bài trắc nghiệm phản ánh khá đúng về mình， và chúng đã có ảnh hưởng mạnh mẽ tới tôi suốt một thời gian dài khi còn đi học phổ thông。 Hồi đó tôi không bao giờ dám tự tin đứng nói trước đám đông chỉ vì hai chữ “hướng nội” – kết quả của MBTI và một số bài trắc nghiệm tính cách khác。 Haizz， đó là một niềm tin tai hại khiến tôi bỏ lỡ vô vàn cơ hội quý báu， và nếu không có một vài sự kiện tâm linh xảy đến sau này， có lẽ ngay bây giờ tôi vẫn mặc nhiên với niềm tin giới hạn ấy。Vậy nên， bài trắc nghiệm tính cách có thể đúng hoặc sai， nhưng đừng để chúng quyết định cuộc đời mình， hãy phá vỡ giới hạn bản thân để trở thành phiên bản tốt nhất。 Bạn không cần phải chờ các trải nghiệm tâm linh như tôi， vì ngay trong cuốn sách này tác giả sẽ chia sẻ từng bước giúp bạn thiết kế và trở thành con người tương lai như mong muốn。Cảm ơn đội ngũ dịch giả Saigon Books， cuốn sách được chuyển ngữ rất tuyệt， tôi cũng thích tiêu đề tiếng Việt， mặc dù nghe có vẻ hơi “giật tít”。~ Tùng Tinh Tấn ~* Xem thêm các bài viết khác của tôi tại đây: https://tungtinhtan。wordpress。com/202。。。 。。。more
Abed Pablo
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I control my personality。 I decide my future will careful and deliberate choices。 4。3 out of 5
A。M。
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This started off good， and the longer it went on， the more I started to think - wait a second。。。 The style is quite repetitive and redundant。 [wait - is that redundant？ I'm tired; it can stay]I could have done without the religious overtones and the use of words like 'filth'。There is a lot of garbage out in the world。 Most of the internet is low-level distraction or filth you simply don’t need or want to know about。 Most movies are useless。（p。 210）。 Rolls eyes。 Filth。 Really？？？Plus， there's the This started off good， and the longer it went on， the more I started to think - wait a second。。。 The style is quite repetitive and redundant。 [wait - is that redundant？ I'm tired; it can stay]I could have done without the religious overtones and the use of words like 'filth'。There is a lot of garbage out in the world。 Most of the internet is low-level distraction or filth you simply don’t need or want to know about。 Most movies are useless。（p。 210）。 Rolls eyes。 Filth。 Really？？？Plus， there's the usual idea that success is linked ONLY to wealth accumulation; but that seems to be a common thing in a LOT of self help titles。And then I hit the section where he tells the story of a mother whose toddler drowned in a drainage canal。 Her husband had not come home and could not be contacted。 She was exhausted and alone and fell asleep after nursing the sick baby。 Her community ostracised her， her husband blamed her; he divorced her and took custody of their other child。 She nearly killed herself。Ten years later， she found out that HE was having an affair with a co-worker， was with her that night and that this woman had also defrauded their business。She began to see her past differently。 For most of her life， she had felt like a victim。 She had felt like she was cursed by God。 But while reading those old journals and reflecting on her experiences， she saw her previous experiences differently。 Rather than curses， she saw compliments。 “God really trusts you，” she thought to herself。 “Everything I’ve gone through is a gigantic compliment from God not only for what I can handle， but for what he wants me to do。” （p。 227）。 You do you， lady but I do not believe in a God that tests your faith by drowning your child。 Fuck that god。Huh; well look at that。 My entire viewpoint of this book changed with that story。2 stars 。。。more
Coleen
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Amazing InsighitsI have saved so many quotes from this book they fill multiple journal pages。 The author also has a great YouTube channel and an informative newsletter！ Thank you Ben for writing this book！
Roma Fernandez
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All these authors write from such a privileged position it makes me sick。。。 he had some good points， and I think the journaling exercises are great， but he definitely lacks empathy。 He obviously has no idea about what it's like to deal with generalized anxiety， he basically says you can just decide to not have anxiety anymore。 Yikes。 The part of the book where he talks about fasting is also kind of dangerous in my opinion， especially since he refers to being fat as a bad thing during the whole b All these authors write from such a privileged position it makes me sick。。。 he had some good points， and I think the journaling exercises are great， but he definitely lacks empathy。 He obviously has no idea about what it's like to deal with generalized anxiety， he basically says you can just decide to not have anxiety anymore。 Yikes。 The part of the book where he talks about fasting is also kind of dangerous in my opinion， especially since he refers to being fat as a bad thing during the whole book。 It can lead to the wrong idea。 He is one of those guys who think that you can achieve anything by working hard enough， when in reality sometimes that's not true。 Some people have awful jobs and can't quit without starving， some people can't speak up in public without shaking or having a bellyache， some people work hard enough and still don't get what they want because of luck。 It's much more complex than what he makes it seem。 I liked the concept of creating the person you want to be， and this was an interesting book， but coming from his limited perspective I just couldn't enjoy it as much as I should have。 。。。more
Zhiqiang
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I borrowed the book from library。 I believed it would be a great book as it is a bestseller。 No。 I finished the first 50 pages， but can't force myself to read further。I started the book believing that it would be elaborating on psychology or academic researches。 Disappointed。The writing is lengthy。 What could be written in a few pages spills over a few pages。 I kept myself focusing on the reading， only ending up know I did not gain much new information from lengthy pages。In sum， the main ideas a I borrowed the book from library。 I believed it would be a great book as it is a bestseller。 No。 I finished the first 50 pages， but can't force myself to read further。I started the book believing that it would be elaborating on psychology or academic researches。 Disappointed。The writing is lengthy。 What could be written in a few pages spills over a few pages。 I kept myself focusing on the reading， only ending up know I did not gain much new information from lengthy pages。In sum， the main ideas are good， but it really requires a lot of patience through the lengthy narration。 I decided to stop loss on my time around page 50。 。。。more
Manjeet Kaur
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Shatters all the human-limiting notions。 Revealing！
Dan H
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This book honestly broke my heart。 During the first few chapters I thought it was shaping up to be one of the best personal development books I’ve ever read-and I’ve read a lot。 Then before I knew it-the book turned into a compilation of random topics having seemingly little to do with the actual premise。He oddly goes into fasting and how pain in the body can be caused by negative emotions。 While that may be true- I didn’t see how it fit in with this book。 It didn’t feel right at all。 It’s almos This book honestly broke my heart。 During the first few chapters I thought it was shaping up to be one of the best personal development books I’ve ever read-and I’ve read a lot。 Then before I knew it-the book turned into a compilation of random topics having seemingly little to do with the actual premise。He oddly goes into fasting and how pain in the body can be caused by negative emotions。 While that may be true- I didn’t see how it fit in with this book。 It didn’t feel right at all。 It’s almost like one person wrote the first half and passed it off to a second person to write the second half。 The author does discuss how he went through a hard time getting motivated to right the year prior to the book being released so perhaps certain parts were written during that period。 It is incredibly repetitive towards the end and not in a creative way。 I wish I counted how many times he repeated life happens for us not to us。 After finishing this book- it could’ve easily been cut in half and kept in line with the original premise。 I feel that he tried too hard to make it do too many things and it was just jumbled。 Also quote after quote from random doctors was annoying along with the lackluster stories。There are some incredible parts and insights in this book which is why I feel bad writing this。 But this book could have been so so much better if the second half was like the first half。 Also the concept that personality isn’t fixed is nothing new。 Maxwell Maltz wrote the Bible on this topic in the 60’s and astonishingly I don’t think the book was referenced at all in this one。 I know it’ll never happen but I really wish the author would rewrite this。 It could be one of the greats。 。。。more
Mariann
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Ez most meglepően jól esett， holott szinte semmi újdonság sincs benne。 Csak a józansága， a stílusa， a megfogalmazás tűnik ki a sok önfényezô self-help könyv közül。
Frederick Griffin
，
Such a liberating read！！I've thoroughly enjoyed gaining a deeper understanding about not being stuck in a classic personality model。 Such a liberating read！！I've thoroughly enjoyed gaining a deeper understanding about not being stuck in a classic personality model。 。。。more
Sara Maddock
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The science was interesting and I appreciated the departure from convention。 But then it devolved into platitudes such as， "Dress like the person you want to be"， GROOOAAANNNNN。 The science was interesting and I appreciated the departure from convention。 But then it devolved into platitudes such as， "Dress like the person you want to be"， GROOOAAANNNNN。 。。。more
Brenda Bergreen
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Loved the concepts in this book and learning some science behind the growth possibilities of personality。 A great read for anyone who has never been satisfied with being put in a personality category and doomed to their fate。 This book puts the choice in our hands of who we choose to be。
Amber Willbanks
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4。5 stars。 I really enjoyed this book and think 95% of it is extremely great advice。 However， I am irked by the fact that the author mentioned how physical pain can be overcome with what I’ll call willpower and positive outlook without acknowledging that this is not possible for quite a lot of physical injuries。 I believe it is dangerous and discouraging to discount that information and am left wondering whether he believes all physical pain is the result of mindsets/emotions。
Andy
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The most successful people in the world base their identify and internal narrative on their future， not their pastYou need an MTP - Massively Transformative Purpose - both personally and professionallyAs you proactively and intentionally make positive decisions， develop skills， and seek out new experiences， your personality will develop and change in meaningful waysWhen you change the context， you simultaneously change the content！ Your past evolves as you evolveYou become who you choose to be。 The most successful people in the world base their identify and internal narrative on their future， not their pastYou need an MTP - Massively Transformative Purpose - both personally and professionallyAs you proactively and intentionally make positive decisions， develop skills， and seek out new experiences， your personality will develop and change in meaningful waysWhen you change the context， you simultaneously change the content！ Your past evolves as you evolveYou become who you choose to be。 In order to become a new person， you must have a new goal - a purpose with pursuingPersonality Isn't Permanent will help you:* Discover the myths of personality that limit most people's potential* Decide for yourself the life you want to live， regardless of how different it is from your past or present* Become emotionally flexible so your past no longer defines you* Reframe trauma and live like everything in your life happens for you， not to you* Become confident enough to define your own life's purpose* Create a network of "empathetic witnesses" who actively encourage you to continue moving forward through your highs and lows* Enhance your subconscious to overcome addictions and limiting patterns* Redesign your environment to pull you toward your future， rather than keep you stuck in the pastYou're the one who decides who you become。 Not some personality test， and not your past。 Who will you choose to be？It isn't the content of your past that need changing， but how you view them today。 The real voyage of discovery consist not in seeking new landscapes， but in having new eyes。 It's not about seeing a million things， but being able to see the same things a million different ways。 And hopefully in better and more useful waysEmotions are the doorway to change and transformation Every time you face your past， you change it。 Every time you face your future with honesty and courage， you become more flexible and mature。 You build confidence， which enhances your imaginationThe reason people's personalities plateau and get stuck in repetitive cycles is because they are avoiding the difficult and challenging emotions involved in learning and in connecting with themselves and others。 As a result， they remain weighted down by their limited perceptions of their past far longer than necessary In the book So Good They Can't Ignore You， Cal Newport argues that rather than trying to find your passion， you should instead develop rare and valuable skills。 Find a need and begin filling it。 Once you've developed skills and being seeing success， passion becomes an organic by-product， or an indirect effect。 Passion comes after you put in the hard work to become excellent at something valuable， not before。 In other words， what you do for a living is much less important than how you do it Passion is the prize， but you have to invest first。 Personality is no different。 It is not something you discover but rather something you create through your actions and behaviors Purpose trumps personality。 When you're driven by purpose， you'll be highly flexible and you'll make decisions irrespective of pain and pleasure to create and become what you want Book: Waking the Tiger: Healing the trauma"Trauma isn't what happens to you; it's what you hold inside in the absence of an empathetic witness。"Although we think of ourselves as consistent， our behavior and attitudes are often shifting。 It isn't our behavior that is consistent， but rather our view of our behavior that makes it seem consistent。 We selectively focus on what we identify with and ignore what we don't"Authenticity" these days is usually another way of saying， "I have a fixed mindset。 I am a certain way and shouldn't be expected to do anything but what comes immediately， naturally and easy for me。 I shouldn't have to do anything but what feels good， right now。"Your vision of where or who you want to be is the greatest asset you have。 Without having a goal， it's difficult to scoreThe primary causes shaping your personality are your goals and the identity and behavior that flow from those goalsYour goals， not some predetermined set of fixed traits， shape your identity。 Over time， and through repeated behavior， your identity becomes your personality Spending your days on activities leading you to something incredibly important， something you truly value， is how you live without regretSuccessful people start with a vision of their future self and use it as the filter for everything they doYour future self and the one major goal is what you should be committed to。 Everything you do needs to be filtered through that one major goalWhen performance is measured， performance improves。 When performance is measured and reported， the rate of improvement acceleratesA mistake repeated more than once is a decisionSuccess at night and in the morning is crucial to becoming your future self"If you haven't read hundreds of books， you are functionally illiterate and you will be incompetent because your personal experiences aren't broad enough to sustain you。" General James MattisIf you wait to wake up until you have to， and thus only engage in "urgent" activities， then you won't make meaningful progress in your lifeAny bold more toward your goal is a power moveBy going to bed with a purpose， waking up， and immediately making progress toward your future self， peak experiences will become commonplace for youIf you want to accelerate learning， you'll need to embrace uncertaintyGet an empathetic witnessListen to them， ask good questions， never judge， and never advise。 These are the key principles to being an empathetic witnessThinking about yourself， what would happen if your future self came to you and told you everything you want to see happen was going to happen？ Would you believe them？ The answer better be yes。 Because unless you believe it， it's not going to happen If you're going to create a powerful future， you'll experience an intense amount of failures， heartaches， bad days， and pain along the way。 You need a team of empathetic witnesses。 You need people who encourage you to keep going - people who encourage you to dream big and encourage your work when others don't understandWho are three important empathetic witnesses in your life right now？What other people could you add， or do you need， as empathetic witnesses？ How much accountability and vulnerability do you currently have？The bigger the dream， the more important the teamA growing person continually has a changing past， expanding in meaning and usefulnessWhen you meet someone， treat them as if they were in serious trouble and you will be right more than half the timeWho are three people you could be an empathetic witness to， right now？Giannis Antetokounmpo is defined by his goals， not his previous accomplishments or failures。 He's defined by what he's going to do next。 He's chasing his future self， and that's why he's continually successfulAlways make your future bigger than your pastWithout a future self that has outgrown and outdone your current self， life starts to lose its meaningNever spend any of your time being the 'former' anythingYour past is happening for you， not to youMeaning is shaped during emotional experiencesThe meaning you formed during former "traumas" is now driving your personality， your choices， and your goals。 Until you change that meaningFormulate meaning based on your desired future self。 This requires being intentional about your interpretation of your experiences， even your hard ones。How would my future self respond to this experience？What would they think about it？How could they turn off this to their benefit？This is happening for me， not to me。Your goals should govern your emotions， even when the initial emotions triggered by the experience are difficultThe better you get at emotional regulation in both small and big experiences， the more psychologically flexible you become。 As you become more psychologically flexible， your emotions and experiences stop defining you in a reactive wayThe meaning you place on past events determines who you are and what you future is。 Changing how you view your past is essential to upgrading your identity and future。 Fundamental to changing your identity is also changing your story。 A new future creates a new past。https://hannahannwee。wordpress。com/20。。。I view my past with increasing compassion， not judgment。 I view my parents with compassion and understanding instead of judgmentOver the past ten years， what significant "wins" or "growth" have you experienced？How have you， as a person， changed？What negative things have you let go of？How have your views of yourself and life changed over the past few years？What are one to three accomplishments or signs of progress you've had in the past ninety days？Have a conversation between your future and form self。 You can do this in your journal， your imagination， in a therapy session， however you want By looking at your past， you will change your past。 Every time you look at your past it will change。 Every time you look at yourself in the mirror， you will changeHow you choose to remember your past is what determines your past far more than what actually happenedThink about one thing in your life that you aren't entirely aligned with。 What would your future be like without that thing in your life？"The bigger your future the better your present" - Dan SullivanIf you change your behavior， your identity will begin to follow suitMake your future self the new standard for your current mindset and behaviorIf you don't change your subconscious， then altering your personality will be difficult。 If you change your subconscious， then altering your personality happens automaticallyRead the book， The Great Pain Deception: Faulty Medical Advice Is Making Us Worse Read the book， The Body Keeps The ScoreRead the book， The Big Leap by Dr。 Gay HendricksThe glue that holds our body， memories， and identity together is our emotionsYour personality is merely a by-product or reflection of where you are emotionally* What would happen if you allowed yourself to feel good more often？* What would happen if you became the person you really wanted to be？The best of all medicines are rest and fasting。 - Benjamin FranklinFasting from food for eighteen-plus hours is one of the most powerful ways to enhance your subconscious Research at Yale has found that being on an empty stomach helps you think and focus better。 Hence， many people such as Malcolm Gladwell， purposefully skip breakfast so they can better focus on their creative workOnce per week you could take a break from food and the internet。 If you did this， you'd be shocked at the clarity and confidence you'd get。 Fasting with a specific purpose and intent makes the experience more powerfulYou have to feel that you deserve good things or else your subconscious might very well sabotage all your best efforts。 If you don't truly feel that you deserve great financial success， then you are battling an almost insurmountable obstacle: your subconscious。 Giving regular gifts from your income to charity is one excellent ways of once and for all， persuading your subconscious that you deserve what lies ahead。 In this way， it will not only end its sabotage， it will begin actively to assist in your quest - Rabbi Daniel LapinGiving money away is a subconscious-enhancing behavior"Giving taps into the spiritual dimension that multiplies us， our thinking， and our results。。。 There is an ocean of abundance and one can tap into it with a teaspoon， a bucket， or a tractor trailer。 The ocean doesn't care。" - Mark Victor HansenFasting and giving are two subconscious-enhancing behaviorsRather than being defined by your former behaviors， you can and should be defined by your future behaviors。 Rather than being defined by experiences from your past， you can and should be defined by the peak experiences you'll create in the future -- those experiences that will transform you from who you are into who you plan to beThe way you see a child is the way you treat them， and the way you treat them is who they will become - GoetheWhen was the last time you did something for the first time？When was the last time you did something unpredictable？When was the last time you put yourself in a new situation or a new role？Are there clothes in your closet that have been there for over five years？My Culture Wall， created by Gapingvoid， displays many of my highest ideals， which I want not only myself but also my children to be continuously reminded ofYour environment should be full of strategic reminders of who you want to be， helping you to become your desired future selfIf you are going to really become your future self， you need an environment that reminds you of that future self， not your former self。 Goals don't become realities without constant remindersWhat transformational triggers can you install into your environment？Where would you put those strategic reminders？Change your computer password to a phrase your future self would useLook at your close and get rid of anything that your future self wouldn't wearFill your entire environment with reminders of your highest aspirations and goalsYour input determines your outlook。 Your outlook determines your output， and your output determines your future"Does this add to or take away from my future self？"book - The paradox of choice by Barry SchwartzYour input shapes your identity， biology， and personality。 When you change your inputs， all of these changeHow can you embed more forcing functions into your life to ensure you become the person you want to be？What situations could you create that would produce powerful results？ Environment is among the most powerful and important personality levers。 If you're serious about changing yourself and your life， you must change your environmentLife is simple。 Everything happens for you， not to you。 - Byron Katie 。。。more
Mahlangu
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This is an excellent book on Personality。 Personality isn't something that is hard-wired into us but is the result of intentional choices that have led up to our current personality。 Personality is a choice， so if you don't like your current personality， you have the power to change it。 This is an excellent book on Personality。 Personality isn't something that is hard-wired into us but is the result of intentional choices that have led up to our current personality。 Personality is a choice， so if you don't like your current personality， you have the power to change it。 。。。more
Jan
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Přečteno se zájmem， občas trochu klišé fráze， ale na zamyšlení a vytažení si určitých pasáží， které nutí k zamyšlení dobré。 Samozřejmě je třeba odhlednout od amerického stylu， kterého ovšem není v této knize přílišný nadbytek。 Občas citováno z knih jiných autorů self develop knížek。
Dileep
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To provide some context， I have read Ben Hardy's last book （Willpower Doesn't Work: Discover the Hidden Keys to Success） and regularly read his blog posts。 I like his writing style and when I got this book I assumed that I would be in for a good book。 I was wrong， this book isn't just "good"， it is "great" and has really exceeded my expectations。The premise of the book is that your past （or your view of it） and as a consequence， your personality， is an active construction of your brain。 This con To provide some context， I have read Ben Hardy's last book （Willpower Doesn't Work: Discover the Hidden Keys to Success） and regularly read his blog posts。 I like his writing style and when I got this book I assumed that I would be in for a good book。 I was wrong， this book isn't just "good"， it is "great" and has really exceeded my expectations。The premise of the book is that your past （or your view of it） and as a consequence， your personality， is an active construction of your brain。 This construct can be molded based on your current decisions set through your goal or "future self"。 The author first describes his view of personality and then proceeds to talk about techniques you can use to guide yourself where you want to go。 Throughout the book， the author gives you useful journaling prompts and exercises that will help guide you in this process。I won't get into the nitty-gritty because the book （and some of his blog posts） already do an amazing job。 I would urge anyone who is interested to read it for themselves。 。。。more
Gaby Lopez
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I think the author did a great job in giving practical advice about how to change things we may not like in our lives and focus on achieving what we really want。 Full of personal stories but also professional advice and opinions。
Jopie Dopie
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This book is more self-help than an evaluation of how personality originates。 There is a lot of anecdotal evidence in the text and the sources are given in the Notes section， by quoting a piece of text from the chapters。 This made it hard to know while reading if the claims were the author's own， from scientific literature or the opinion of a professional from the field。 This book is more self-help than an evaluation of how personality originates。 There is a lot of anecdotal evidence in the text and the sources are given in the Notes section， by quoting a piece of text from the chapters。 This made it hard to know while reading if the claims were the author's own， from scientific literature or the opinion of a professional from the field。 。。。more
Mioree
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⭐️2Ok， book， yet not nearly as good as some other books tackling this topic。 Yes， personality is not permanent， I'm fairly convinced about that。 Read "Atomic Habits" to get the HOW-TO of changing it。But if you need a hype audio track for motivation as you're trying to change this will do the trick。 ⭐️2Ok， book， yet not nearly as good as some other books tackling this topic。 Yes， personality is not permanent， I'm fairly convinced about that。 Read "Atomic Habits" to get the HOW-TO of changing it。But if you need a hype audio track for motivation as you're trying to change this will do the trick。 。。。more
Jerry Quinn
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Thank you to another good friend for recommending this book - Thank you， John！I loved this book and has been my favorite read of the year so far。 Some of my lessons that I learned to help shift my mindset:• Shift from the GAPs to the GAINs to see the growth and progress• Every time you retrieve a memory it changes so what you thought in the past may not be how you think today• The bigger you visualize your future， the better your present becomes / Act in alignment of your future selfI also loved Thank you to another good friend for recommending this book - Thank you， John！I loved this book and has been my favorite read of the year so far。 Some of my lessons that I learned to help shift my mindset:• Shift from the GAPs to the GAINs to see the growth and progress• Every time you retrieve a memory it changes so what you thought in the past may not be how you think today• The bigger you visualize your future， the better your present becomes / Act in alignment of your future selfI also loved this question near the end of the book where Hardy asks us "When was the last time you did something for the first time？" Inspiring， empowering and motivating。 A。 Great。 Book。 。。。more
Conor Clancy
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This book isn't about personality so much as it's about habits and actions。 The author argues they are the same。 I argue that whether this is true or not， the book's a worse Atomic Habits。 Hardy flip-flops between ideas between paragraphs。 He criticizes theories like the enneagram and MBTI pseudoscience （reasonably so） while offering nothing but anecdote to support his own contrasting views。 I don't care if you know someone who went from banker-to-mountain-climber。 Who does？ As another reviewer This book isn't about personality so much as it's about habits and actions。 The author argues they are the same。 I argue that whether this is true or not， the book's a worse Atomic Habits。 Hardy flip-flops between ideas between paragraphs。 He criticizes theories like the enneagram and MBTI pseudoscience （reasonably so） while offering nothing but anecdote to support his own contrasting views。 I don't care if you know someone who went from banker-to-mountain-climber。 Who does？ As another reviewer pointed out， that's not relatable to most readers。 I want stronger evidence than Elon Musk's dream of dying on Mars to back up points。 Coupled with the over-simplified definition of personality he relies on throughout the book， most of his points have dropped all their water by the 20% mark。 The idea that we choose how to act and our actions shape our character is fine， but he fails to address what makes us want/not want to choose what we do/don't do。 Social pressures are offered as an explanation， but he doesn't delve into why this would be the case。 He also doesn't explain how people who DON'T succumb to social pressures （anyone gender non-conforming， anyone with even slightly esoteric interests） gravitate to the passions they have。 His presentation of humanity as this semi-robotic， unthinking mass is unconvincing to anyone who actually lives on the planet。 I could make some complaints about his writing here， too， but they're secondary to how unconvincing the content is。 The one I'll mention is that after spending several rambling pages explaining that focusing on the "process" of an aim is inferior to being entirely goal-focused， he uses tactical and strategic as antonyms （what？） and then goes on to detail how you should sleep/wake an hour earlier if you're serious about your goals。。。 which is a process change。 That requires focusing on your process。 Which is what he just told us not to do。 I。。。OK？ Finally， Hardy relies too often on long， winding success stories as proof of his point in this book。 Name drops include Elon Musk， Mark Wahlberg， Gandhi， Matthew Mcconaughey。。。 If there is any credence to Hardy's view， you won't find any evidence of it between the front and back covers of Personality Isn't Permanent。 I've quite literally never been so irritated by a book before。 。。。more
Petro Kacur
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The premise that who you are -- your personality -- is not fixed is an excellent starting point for the rest of this entertaining addition to the pantheon of recent self-help books that include citations to scientifically validated research。 Hardy presents the material in a logical format and includes relevant anecdotes from his own life， those he's interviewed and stories pulled from public media。 The primary idea that your personality constantly changes throughout a lifetime is a liberating vi The premise that who you are -- your personality -- is not fixed is an excellent starting point for the rest of this entertaining addition to the pantheon of recent self-help books that include citations to scientifically validated research。 Hardy presents the material in a logical format and includes relevant anecdotes from his own life， those he's interviewed and stories pulled from public media。 The primary idea that your personality constantly changes throughout a lifetime is a liberating viewpoint that opens up all the strategies that follow - from reframing your biographical narrative （your past experiences happened "for" you not "to" you） to creating your "future self" through changing your environment （the call to stop watching the news acquires the brilliant tag of "strategic ignorance"。 That summarizes the book， but it is well worth the the read。 As Zig Ziglar said "Your input determines your outlook。 Your outlook determines your output。 And your output determines your future。" You are a work in progress， you might as well be intentional about it。 By the way， this topic is gaining more attention - HBO has recently （early 2021） aired "Persona" that calls into question the entire $2 billion personality test industry。 。。。more
Monica
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Good book， mainly because of the stories he included about other people， but this book is about actions and habits， not personality。
Sarah Groh correa
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I am always looking for new angles and books to support the College level Life Skills class I teach。 This is one of them。 Changing our past to be our true self and our future best - is the backbone of this book。
Mojtaba
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